i'm bored..at home..nothing to do..sianz ah..wat a boring hol..i think my life is juz about hball n trainings n nothing else..pple ask me go out..be it gathering or juz gg out for lunch or dinner..i'm juz plain lazy to go out..juz find it troublesome to go out..muz entertain pple who i haven seen for ages..when i dun talk they think i'm bored..but it juz me..too lazy to talk..prefer to listen..i like it dis way..listen n not talk..but when i do talk..i'm in the crappy and crazy n siao mood..but it's damn tiring to be in this state..i'm juz plain lazy to be so. i'm a loner. i'm a lazy person. pple invite me into their grp..i prefer to isolate myself..n when pple gave up asking me to join them, i think they dun like me..they isolate me..and i start to feel depress..wat on earth am i doing???!?!!! haiz. sianz. took me 1yr to figure this out. haiz. haiz.

wat lousy results. how cld i scored so low for cs2301???!! thought cld get at least a B-. oh well. i guess i'm juz not gd enough. i'm damn demoralise. damn sad. who understands? my best sem yet improve overall cap by 0.01. heck. WTH!!! forever C+s for cs modules. no matter how much effort i put in. eg. cs2301, i spent damn a lot of time on it yet i got C+. spent whole 1wk plus 2 wks studying for cs2102, got C+. spent less time on cs2105 but yet the time spent is still significant, i get C+. sianz. sianz sianz sianz. genes n soc, food n health also didnt get wat i wanted. i feel so sad. i think i'm juz stupid. wat a wk. wat a day. wat a hol. i dun feel the festive mood at all. i dun like dis. time is passing too fast. it's flying past me..without me realising i'm taking time for granted. haiz haiz.

merry christmas but this christmas is not merry for me at all..lousy results for lousy pple like me. i'm a bad gal. n a sad gal. n a demoralised gal. n a depressed gal. n a lonely gal...haiz. sianz.